Saturday: spent the entire day indoors. Watched the emotional divide occur between me and val; realized one day we won't belong to each other anymore. wondered why I haven't heard from walter and then I consider...
Friday: spent most of evening indoors getting my buttons pushed by walter. He has a special talent for being a doddering oaf around me and I have a list of pet peeves and indiscretions as long as my arm. I just cannot fathom why someone so capable can be so profoundly obtuse. The worst offense: we've eaten dinner, he has something stuck in his teeth. He asks me for floss. I give him some. He proceeds to floss in front of everyone, smacking his lips and twisting his tongue around even though I handed him the floss in the bathroom. I object. He treats me like a crazy person and continues to floss in the presence of three people who are his friends. No one says anything. He then dangles the floss in my face on his way to the garbage.
Also on Friday: I receive a text message from a number not in my phone book and I wonder who it could be from. Rather than respond immediately, I think about it and eventually forget it. If it was someone I wanted to talk to, I'd know their number. I suspect it may have been the singer who I've basically deleted from my life and I don't care if it was him or not. I feel a strange sense of freedom I don't recognize. Usually I would clamor and fuss over such an event, instead I let it pass.
Thursday: spend the morning languishing in bed, then cleaning my newly acquired bathroom. It is a big bathroom and has a lot of nooks and crannies that are all beyond filthy. I hunker down for a long clean and then shower in the sparkling white tub. I clean even though I won't be there for three days. I clean even though I don't have to. I want to be a good roommate this time around.
Wednesday: I spend almost the entire day trying to rid my newly acquired bedroom of dust bunnies and boxes from my move. I am successful in managing to squeeze my life into one small space and it doesn't look half bad. There is a strange kind of energy in that room that is good, vibrant stuff, but totally different than any other room I've ever had. It has a window facing north, I will sleep with my head facing west and it is in the middle of the apartment rather than the front or back.
Tuesday: I work for eleven hours straight. I am barely able to stand upright at the end of it, but I know what awaits me at the end is worth it; getting together with an old friend of his, who has become a friend of mine and the promise that we will go to taqueria moran. I am enthralled by a visit to his work studio and his endeavors and saddened by the hipsters at taqueria moran. More saddened by the fact that I look more like a hipster to unscrutinizing eyes than I'd like to. I go home, filled up to bursting by my friend's presence and I spend the night festering in happiness again (the second time in a week!).
Monday: The dog walking stint comes to a thankful close. I negotiate like a mad woman via text about keys, times and information regarding the dog. I get mosquito bites, I meet dog parents, I stand around while the dog chases others dogs. I find out after work that my bartender has named walter my "fusband," a combination of the words "fake" and "husband" and I wonder when the firing squad will ever relent and if my absence from that place will be enough.
In essence, my week was as full as it always is, but there was something different about this week and it was me.
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