home run

I felt the shyness bubble up inside me and then let it burst and asked her some questions and we started talking and it was like we've known each other for a long time already and it confirmed what I have discovered and begun to realize that there's just a certain kind of person who is my type, the genuine, kind, lively, warm and fuzzy person (even though I wouldn't necessarily count myself among their ranks) and she was for me.

There are lots of people who are not for me. But her, with her wild mane of curly hair, which I demanded a detailed description of her regimen from start to finish, she is for me. We had such a quick and easy connection that I was already inviting myself into her world and she was tickled by the invitation. We exchanged promises of Barbeques, margaritas, and art gallery visits.

She had a big deep throaty laugh. She is a smart person. And she likes to read. And she was worried about my wandering off during the movie. I assured her that I was just uncomfortable, as I put it, "I'm a giant person with big limbs and I can't be contained in one small tiny area...!" It's been rare that I meet someone I feel an instant connection with, but lately it makes me happy that it is maybe not as rare as it used to be.

I seem to be going through a new cycle of friendships, where a lot of the friends I've had for the last three years I've outgrown. They were all very good friends and I love them still, but it's obvious and apparent to me that I just need something different in my life than what we had. I've noticed that a lot of the newer friends in my life are people who want to do something, be active, walk around, go somewhere, and that is the opposite of the crowd I've been in for the last three years, good great people who are perfectly happy to pass hours upon hours at a table in a bar talking about nothing (not that there's anything wrong with that).

I wonder if it has something to do with the fact that it's summertime and I just feel this inexplicable urge to go outside, to feel the sun on my skin, to partake in the glories of summer in ways I've never wanted to or cared to before. For instance, on Sunday night I went to Ravinia for the first time with a good friend from school who I don't see often. I received a Ravinia gift certificate as a birthday present three years ago that I never used until Sunday. I wanted to use it, I asked my friends (in my close circle) and they seemed open to it, but we just never got away from that table and that talk about nothing long enough to actually go.

With the park next door to my new apartment being so accessible, I went out yesterday and sat on a bench and read a book and rolled up my sleeves and pant legs so that the sun could hit the pale parts of my skin and I used to laugh at those people and now I am one of them.

And tonight, in a big crowd of people so big it made me hate that I live in a city, I was moody, achy, disinterested and she wiped that all away and made the night worthwhile because she's for me.